Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Same Love

Beautiful photos, beautiful story: lesbian wedding photos get love on Tumblr

And more photos of the adorable brides: the "blooper reel"

In the spirit of celebrating marriage equality, here's my all-time favorite music video. I've watched it at least twenty times (and that was BEFORE I even knew I was part of the LGBTQ community).

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Unleashing My Inner Slut

WARNING: This post is about my sex life. If you're a relative or otherwise find the topic TMI, you'll want to skip this one.

This week I hit three thrilling milestones in my sexual liberation:

1. I had sex with two men in the same day (but alas, not at the same time, that is next on my bucket list).
Since Jake and I put our sex life on pause when she started transitioning, this is actually the first time in my life I've had two simultaneous sexual relationships. I finally had my poly cherry popped so to speak. Scandalous? Hardly. My partners all know and like each other, and are informed about exactly what I'm up to everyday.

2. I had my first orgasm that didn't involve my own hands.

3. I went to my first sex party.
I had heard the term "sex positive community," but I still didn't expect everyone to be so warm, joyful and friendly (in a non sleazy way). I was shocked at how utterly comfortable I felt stripping down and having sex inches away from strangers. I didn't get off on the novelty or the voyeurism/exhibitionist aspects as I expected; just the amazing orgasmic energy in the room. Bradley and I only played with each other as planned due to our safety rules.

I'm not going to write about these things in any greater detail, because it's not that kind of blog. But let's just say I F*ING LOVE MY NEW LIFE!

And I regret giving my mom this URL.

Friday, April 18, 2014

Stop saying "whatever makes you happy"

People often say to my spouse about her transition, "Whatever makes you happy." Some say it with a dismissive passive-aggressive tone. Others say it with a warmhearted caring tone. We wish they wouldn't say it at all.

Changing genders isn't about the pursuit of happiness; it's about survival.

Finding a better job makes you happy. Getting a new wardrobe makes you happy. Adopting a pet makes you happy... These are lifestyle choices.

Gender change is a medical necessity to endure life. If it weren't, suicide rates among trans people wouldn't be so high, and transition wouldn't include medical treatments covered by insurance.

You wouldn't tell a cancer patient that you support her decision to undergo chemo because "whatever makes you happy." The end-result may be a happier life free from cancer, but the treatment is miserable. Likewise, transition is a long and painful process to free the patient from gender dysphoria. Nobody makes the decision lightly.

"Whatever makes you happy" demonstrates a lack of understanding about the gravity of the transgender condition and the challenges of transition. Please don't say it. There are better ways to show your support.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

This is wholesome (screw homophobia)

Honey Maid created a beautiful commercial celebrating the diversity of families:

Naturally, a bunch of conservatives wrote angry letters, criticizing that the ad is disgusting and normalizes sin.

Rather than pander to bigoted consumers, Honey Maid created a work of art from the hate mail, lovingly saying f-you to homophobia:

Genius advertising. I need to buy some graham crackers now.

Saturday, April 5, 2014

New Blog Name & URL- Transfinite Love

1. going beyond or surpassing the finite
My love for my trans wife is transfinite.
People who practice polyamory believe that love is transfinite rather than a scarce resource.

I am renaming my blog Transfinite Love- transfinitelove.blogspot.com. If you follow me in your blog feed (thank you so much!!), please update the URL. I'll be switching over in the next couple weeks.

I am terrible at naming things; I could never be a copywriter who expeditiously creates clever brand names. When I launched this blog, I was impatient to start writing, and I plopped in the best name I could think up. I've since decided that "Joyful Girl" doesn't adequately reflect the content on here, so I'm changing it while my blog is still relatively unestablished.

I googled "transfinite love" and the first search result is a video of a math geek performing a love poem to his wife at a poetry slam. That sealed the deal: